We think we know who we are but do we really show who we are?
Often the image of ourselves is not in sync with the image others have of us.
What and who we portray to others can affect everything about us and how others react to us.
I believe it is because of our presence and posture.
When I was an HR Manager, two of the biggest things I looked for in hiring managers was their presence and posture.
And the same goes for now, as a leader and entrepreneur, I look for those same qualities in others who want to join my team.
Presence and posture indicate to others who we really are and what we are truly feeling inside.
So what do we mean by presence?
In her book, Presence, Author Amy Cuddy defines it this way:
- Presence is the state of being attuned and able to comfortably express our true thoughts, feelings, values and potential.
- When we have presence we are powerful, confident, focused and authentic.
- And when we have presence, then our body language including facial expressions, posture and movements are all in synchronization with it.
- Strong presence reflects a positive image of ourselves to others.
The other key thing I feel is so important is posture.
Because it is so visual!
When I say posture, I really mean everything I stated above that people see (not hear) in us, including facial expressions, eye contact, bearing, stance, poses, dress, shoes, grooming, nervousness, tenseness, relaxation, etc.
Not surprisingly, these are all things that people judge us on, immediately. The input to the first impression!
“Of all the things you wear, your posture is the most important.” – Anon
If we don’t have strong presence and posture, then our outward portrayal of ourselves indicates fear, weakness, lack of confidence, incapability, fakeness and so forth.
“To often we approach our lives’ biggest hurdles with dread, execute them with anxiety, and leave them with regret.” – Amy Cuddy, Harvard Professor, Social Psychologist, Author, and Speaker
Then, of course, this is what others see in us.
What do you want people to see in you?
I am sure you want them to see the true authentic you, through strong presence and good posture.
Work on your presence and posture every day – it is ongoing work, one that never ends if you truly want to succeed in life.